How do you deal with discipline issues with your child?

Published: 04th April 2011
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"Spare the rod and spoil the child" is a common phrase all of us are familiar with, but not very many parents necessarily apply. Children need parents who will nurture them, teach them, and discipline them into becoming well-behaved children. On, the contrary, most parents want to do for their child what they couldn’t get from their parents so if a parent has been harsh and rough on the child, it is quite likely that when the child grows up to become a parent, the behavior towards his child will be far too soft and the child won’t be able to take even the slightest of harshness. Well it’s all fine to be gentle and soft with your child, but not exposing them to a bit of roughness, will not prepare them to deal with a rough world. Parents must be able to reinforce and reward the child’s behavior when it is good by say, taking them for a match, or a movie and punish them when they’re naughty and rude so that they remember the outcome of their behavior and learn to behave in a socially acceptable and responsible manner when they grow up. In short, to neglect disciplining a child is to create trouble for your child later on. Every child is different, has different temperaments and possesses different levels of development. Adopting a style of discipline that works with one child need not work with your child. As a parent, you must intervene to improve their behaviors as early as possible. Some of the techniques you could adopt to discipline your child are as follows:
  1. Permissive Approach - Involves hardly any disciplining and
    Behavioural Outcome - Children grow up confused, insecure and without any sense of ethics.
  2. Authoritarian Approach: It involves a strictness with an emphasis on perfection, lack of praise.
    Behavioural Outcome - Children tend to become argumentative, rebellious, and grow up to resent authority.

  3. Democratic Approach: Rules set, guidelines for permissible behaviour spelt out - unishments and reward technique
    Behavioural Outcome: Children can make healthy decisions, have a clear concept of right and wrong and are confident.

You must also understand the majority of disciplining your child actually lies in your hands. Suppose, each time your child throws a tantrum to be carried and eventually becomes violent. Please remain firm and do not give into any tantrum. Carry the child when the child has calmed down on its own. This way the child will understand that crying and throwing a tantrum doesn’t pay. This will also help the child later on, when it wants something, it will learn to wait for it in a mature manner rather than breaking down and crying for it. If you are firm and consistent the child will eventually learn that it doesn't pay to pay to dictate terms to a parent or any authority later on.
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